Blog as a log

According to wikipedia a blog is a Web site, usually maintained by an individual with regular entries of commentary, descriptions of events, or other material such as graphics or video. Entries are commonly displayed in reverse-chronological order. "Blog" can also be used as a verb, meaning to maintain or add content to a blog. Term blog comes from reverse abreviating web log or weblog shortening it by removing the we and getting blog.

If a blog is a web log, what is it logging?

The free dictionary describes a log as:
log 1 (lôg, lg) n.
1.
a. A usually large section of a trunk or limb of a fallen or felled tree.
b. A long thick section of trimmed, unhewn timber.
2. Nautical
a. A device trailed from a ship to determine its speed through the water.
b. A record of a ship's speed, its progress, and any shipboard events of navigational importance.
c. The book in which this record is kept.
3. A record of a vehicle's performance, as the flight record of an aircraft.
4. A record, as of the performance of a machine or the progress of an undertaking: a computer log; a trip log.

Being that a blog doesn't have anything to do with trees, wood, ships, or vehicles (unless that is what the author is blogging about) we can take the log part of blog to mean that it is a record or journal (bjournal doesn't really work, it sounds like a Swedish word)

Well then, if a blog is a record or journal, what am I recording or journaling about? In the case of my blog I am recording my random thoughts and observations.

Embracing Annoyances

Embrace what is annoying me, maybe it is exactly what I am supposed to be paying attention to and the annoyance is just resistance trying to trick me.

Comment on Expectations

My friend MaryLou sent me the below e-mail about expectations and gave me permission to share it. I thought it was pretty enlightening.

Expectations can be a confusing topic. Most of us have expectations. We entertain certain notions, on some level of consciousness, about how we hope things will turn out or how we want people to behave. But it is better to relinquish expectations, so we can detach. It is better to refrain from forcing our expectations on others or refrain from trying to control the outcome of events, since doing so causes problems and is usually impossible anyway. So where do we go with our expectations?

Some people strive to relinquish all expectations and live moment to moment. That is admirable. But I think the important idea here is to take responsibility for our expectations. Get them out into light. Examine them. Talk about them. If they involve other people, talk to the people involved. Find out if they have similar expectations. See if they’re realistic. For example, expecting healthy behavior from unhealthy people is futile; expecting different results from the same behaviors, according to many experts is insane. Then, let go. See how things turn out. Let things happen – without forcing. If we are constantly disappointed, we have a problem to solve – either with ourselves, another person, or a situation.

It’s okay to have expectations. At times, they are real clues to what we want, need, hope for, and fear. We have a right to expect good things and appropriate behavior. We will probably get more of these things (the good stuff and the appropriate behavior) if we consistently expect these things. If we have expectations, we will also realize when they are not being met. But we need to realize these are only expectations; they belong to us, and we’re not always boss. We can make sure our expectations are realistic and appropriate and not let them interfere with reality or let them spoil the good things that are happening.

Contemplating Expectations

I am looking up expectation right now. On Wikipedia expecation is defined as what is considered most likely to happen in the case of uncertainty. An expectation is a belife centred on the ftureu so it may mor may not be realistic. IF an expectation is less advantageous then what was expected then the emotion of disappointments is given rise. If something happens that isn't expected, surprise results. An expectation about the behavior or performance of another person, expressed to that personm may have the nature of a strong request or order.

Well if expectations exist and they don't occur dissapointment occurs, if they don't exist at all the only thing that can come is surprise. And if someone expects things from someone else resentment can occur because it denotes control.

If nothing is ever expected then there is no dissapointment, only surprise and you won't be seen as controlling, demanding, or righteous.

Is this right? Is expectation that bad? Am I never supposed to assume that something might happen based on my past experience? I can't say that I know what I am supposed to do but I do have to say that it does seem like a better life can be lived with no expectations; I would trade dissapointment for surprise any day.

52 good deeds

Here is an idea that can change your world. Do 1 good deed a week for the year. Plan it during your weekly review and make it count. I am not talking random act of kindness here. 1 planned good deed each week.
No rules other than that, big or small it is up to you.
i

Brian Darnell
darnellster@gmail.com
http://12hourhalfday.blogspot.com
http://www.unvoicedvisions.com

Don't let the jack asses win

I was just chatting with my good buddy Matt about being open and trusting with people and how people aren’t always open for fear of getting hurt. His words:

“If you are not open to the nice people the jackasses win and I am too stubborn to let the jackasses win”

I am going to take his example and risk getting hurt a bit and be more trusting, let’s not let the jackasses win. 

My view every day when I get to work.

This is what I get to see every morning walking into the office. I love my job! And I love living in this beautiful valley.

Brian Darnell
darnellster@gmail.com
http://12hourhalfday.blogspot.com
http://www.unvoicedvisions.com

Annoynances

Let go of the things that annoy me, I have been choosing to have them annoy me, let's choose to be entertained by them instead.

Salted duck eggs

Yes, I at 2 of these. I had never tried anything like this before and I have to tell you I was very apprehensive. The feelings that went through me were OMG am I going to bite through a baby duck? is it going to be really salty? do they burry them in the ground?
But I tried them. Did I like them, that is hard to say, they were a whole lot more salty than I am used to and the texture was very different from a normal hard boiled egg, it was gritty and was similar to dirt.
There are cultures that eat these kinds of things as a staple snack; with different traditions in a culture a person’s palette could be completely different that when offered this kind of food could be accepted like we would accept potato chips or a candy bar.
I think over time I could enjoy something like this as my palette adjusted but for now they are an interesting exotic snack to try every once in a while.

My challenge to you:
Try one new thing a day for 7 days. Share those things with me and please share your experience with me; if you like, put it as a comment on the blog. It doesn’t have to be a food, you can go to a store you have never been to before, try a volunteer service or give money to a homeless person when you normally would have just walked by. What new thing could you try every day?

Brian Darnell
darnellster@gmail.com
http://12hourhalfday.blogspot.com
http://www.unvoicedvisions.com

As opposed to indedible?

Brian Darnell
darnellster@gmail.com
http://12hourhalfday.blogspot.com
http://www.unvoicedvisions.com

Lord, please help me to surrender

If God brought Jesus into the world in conditions of poverty and his plan was to go through horrible pain and ultimately die to save us, who am I to complain about my life and my conditions when he was willing to die for me? Anxiety is arrogance and sin. It is the surrender to the idea that I have any hope of controlling my life when I should be surrendering to God. Who am I to try to make it better when his will is what matters. In fact, I should be able to surrender to God and not worry about this world hen I am saved and destined for eternal life anyway, with eternal life in my future, what is there to worry about now?

I need to stay prayerful and keep surrender to God in mind, my filter should be God focused and his will will be more obvious to me.

Dear Lord,

Please help me to surrender to you, please help me to remember that you are in control.

In your every present holy name,

Amen

A little creative self exploration

What the heck am I creatively anyway? Am I a writer or a photographer. I find myself asking this question a lot when I have the choice between taking pictures and writing. The truth is, I am neither. I feel like I am looking at it from too low a level. I am neither a writer nor a photographer. Now, I do take pictures personally and professionally and I do write a blog, a journal, and am working on a book so doesn't that define me as a writer and a photographer? No, I don't believe so. I could say it defines me as an artist but I don’t like that word, it comes across as pretentious. It brings to mind images of a cartoony French man with a wispy mustache wearing a derby cocking is chin up and exclaiming “I am an arteest!”

I could look at it from a higher level and say “I am a human being”. That would be true but it doesn’t accomplish anything other than acknowledge what I already know to be true, that I am a bipedal primates in the family Hominidae capable of abstract reasoning, language, introspection and problem solving.

Why I am I defining what I am anyway? The purpose of defining what I am creatively is to choose what the best activity would be at any given time whether that would be writing or photography. I should also include other artistic medium that I have engaged in: drawing, painting, digital art, ink wash, etc. What should I do?

That fact is, I shouldn’t choose based on what I am defining myself as because when it comes down to it I am not any of those things but I am also all of those things. I have to face the music. I am an artist. Not in the pretentious sense but in the sense that anyone who works creatively is. I am an artist just as a songwriter, blogger, actor, and so on; let’s also include other creative professions – Researcher, scientist, mathematician, physicist, etc! I and they are all artists. We do not wear derbies and exclaim this as an excuse not to engage in something that is below our artistic genius, we simply are.

So how do I choose what to do? I choose the best thing to do moment by moment. Now excuse me, I have wasted a lot of time writing here, I have to go take some pictures. J

A little technical issue...

My power supply died so I got a new one and am putting it in right now, it is amazing how quickly the room fell into chaos after the computer died. I have big plans for it today. Wait till you see the after picture.

Brian Darnell
darnellster@gmail.com
http://12hourhalfday.blogspot.com
http://www.unvoicedvisions.com

OMG another asian market!

I am learning more and more about my town every day!

Brian Darnell
darnellster@gmail.com
http://12hourhalfday.blogspot.com
http://www.unvoicedvisions.com

Another discovery

I had heard of the community pantry prior to my current job but didn't really know any details. My boss is heavily involved. I volunteered today for the first time in 5 years. Why did I wait so long?
All I can do now is focus on the present, and not worry of how I have been in the past.
This operation looks really cool and I am looking forward to a morning opf hard work.

Brian Darnell
darnellster@gmail.com
http://12hourhalfday.blogspot.com
http://www.unvoicedvisions.com

Asian market in Hemet

I know only one person who reads this blog that is local to Hemet but even if you don't live here you probably appreciate this kind of thing; discovering something new in the town you live in. I took the day off to finish my final paper for my class, Sarah talked me in to doing it last night so I have the whole day free so we are exploring Hemet, finding new things including this wonderful asian market. Thank God for the new that is always in front of us. I need to remind myself of that when I get bored with where I live.

Brian Darnell
darnellster@gmail.com
http://12hourhalfday.blogspot.com
http://www.unvoicedvisions.com

Suit up show up.

The lecture at the martial arts studio inspired me last night. Professor kenn talked about discipline to a class as the ability to suit up and show up. Such a simple concept I forgot it.
But here I am, at the gym first thing in the morning and I feel great because of it, I suited up, showed up and not only did 30 minutes of cardio but practiced Iaido for an hour. I am overjoyed with how much I got out of it and my day is just starting.

Brian Darnell
darnellster@gmail.com
http://12hourhalfday.blogspot.com
http://www.unvoicedvisions.com

Clam Murder

Ingredients
1 can clam chowder
1 tbsp Blair's original death
Instructions
Heat clam chowder, add death, eat, sweat. :)

Brian Darnell
darnellster@gmail.com
http://12hourhalfday.blogspot.com
http://www.unvoicedvisions.com

Paralyzed with fear

How do you deal with fear? Is fear the same as resistance? I don't know. Resistance is always negative or at least it seems that way to me while fear...fear is a reminder to be cautious but fear can be irrational so it could be negative too. Hmmm

Brian Darnell
darnellster@gmail.com
http://12hourhalfday.blogspot.com
http://www.unvoicedvisions.com

Beautiful angels

I am sitting and listening to the choir and Sarah's beautiful voice. Gosh I fall in love with her all over again every time I hear her beautiful voice.

Brian Darnell
darnellster@gmail.com
http://12hourhalfday.blogspot.com
http://www.unvoicedvisions.com

Life

I am reading about life; reading about it in the book Taming Your Gremlin by Rick Carson. I was going to take a picture of the book itself and talk about starting it and what my hopes and expectations (expectations! Bad Brian, you are supposed to be living with an empty cup!) were for it but then I laid the camera on the page I was reading and bang! It hit me.
Life
What impact that word holds! On page 2 of the book Mr. Carson defines a person as something more than bodies, personalities, beliefs, or thoughts. He defines a person as a life with a consciousness to make choices with an evil inhabitant known as a gremlin that attempts to make sure those choices are the wrong choices and all thoughts are negative. (I for one think that all thoughts are bad but thinking isn't bad in itself (digest that!)
I am going to like this book.

Brian Darnell
darnellster@gmail.com
http://12hourhalfday.blogspot.com
http://www.unvoicedvisions.com

Reading a graphic novel just for the movie.- The Watchmen

The Watchmen movie is coming out in March next year so when I saw this on the shelf in LA this past weekend I had to pick it up. I finished it yesterday and it definitely deserves all of the accolades it has gotten. I am very much looking forward to the movie.

Without revealing anything about the plot I can tell you that the story is very rich. It provides details on all the major characters in a way that I have not seen done in many novels. I also found the story stimulating on political, social, and emotional levels.

If I could sum up the novel in 1 sentence I would say,

"It humanizes superheroes"

I fully recommend it to the comic book reader and the non comicbook reader alike.

Brian Darnell
darnellster@gmail.com
http://12hourhalfday.blogspot.com/
http://www.unvoicedvisions.com/

Today's affirmation

God is present in my life. I can rely on him and can feel save, secure, and happy no matter what happens. It is all God's will. It has always worked out before so it is always going to work. The bad is good because the bad has always had a purpose before, bad things are good thigns because they always have a purpose.

Brian Darnell
darnellster@gmail.com
http://12hourhalfday.blogspot.com
http://www.unvoicedvisions.com

Learn from mistakes

I must feel good about mistakes. I must take the impact of being confronted with a mistake and accept how that makes me feel and use that energy to make positive change in my life.

Brian Darnell
darnellster@gmail.com
http://12hourhalfday.blogspot.com
http://www.unvoicedvisions.com

OMG it's real!

I can't believe it. I have always seen it in movies but it is actually real! Big freakin donut!

Brian Darnell
darnellster@gmail.com
http://12hourhalfday.blogspot.com
http://www.unvoicedvisions.com

Sarah's wonderful cell phone photos

Sarah took these while walking through the Grove mall in the fairfax district. They sure came out great for pics taken with a blackberry. I guess it is the eye of the photographer that matters more than the tool he/she uses.

Brian Darnell
darnellster@gmail.com
http://12hourhalfday.blogspot.com
http://www.unvoicedvisions.com

We think it has Santa's blood in it.

We couldn't think of anything else that would make this especially christmas soda.

Brian Darnell
darnellster@gmail.com
http://12hourhalfday.blogspot.com
http://www.unvoicedvisions.com

Behold! Super sarah!

Behold! My girlfriend Sarah, semi sloshed last night. We had fun. :)

Brian Darnell
darnellster@gmail.com
http://12hourhalfday.blogspot.com
http://www.unvoicedvisions.com

Behold! Mojito!

Behold! The best mojito on the planet!

Brian Darnell
darnellster@gmail.com
http://12hourhalfday.blogspot.com
http://www.unvoicedvisions.com

Behold!

Behold! The nut tray at the La airport hilton's bar. I am here till Sunday and my only reason? Because it's free (the hotel stay, not the nut tray even though that is free to and not a tray but a bowl;just not the reason for the stay...but good though)

Brian Darnell
darnellster@gmail.com
http://12hourhalfday.blogspot.com
http://www.unvoicedvisions.com

This is what preparing for a trip looks like

This is what the room looks like while preparing to leave for LA for the weekend. It is 15:00 and we have to be out the door by 15:30. Let's see what we can accomplish

Brian Darnell
darnellster@gmail.com
http://12hourhalfday.blogspot.com
http://www.unvoicedvisions.com

Leave it with God

Don't be annoyed or anxious…let go…leave it in God's hands. Do I trust God? Yes, he has never let me down before and has come through for me numerous times in miraculous ways. Leave it in God's hands, you trust God, rest in him.

Lose Control

I don't need to control anything because I can't and never will be in control, I can leave it up to God and surrender to his will.

What is possible on a 30 minute break?

I just got back from my half hour “lunch” break but no eating occurred. I had a small snack at my desk and went for a 30 minute walk with my camera in hand. It is amazing what one can accomplish in those 30 minutes, before I left I was starting to feel the bear of work and was having trouble rapidly refocusing between 3 projects whose outcomes are all due this week. I had a little resistance to taking my break but pushed through it and went for a walk, camera with 200mm zoom lens in hand. What did I get out of this? A nice stress relieving walk, some good pictures of beautiful autumn leaves (California, December is Autumn, what can I say?) and I discovered that one can walk pretty far in 30 minutes and still make it back with 5 minutes to spare to stow my camera.

My challenge to you:

Take your breaks! Go somewhere, do something, don’t get caught up in the boundaries of work. I did it and now I am refocused, I know exactly what actions I have to take between my 3 projects and will not only move forward on them but will ensure that their outcomes are complete by tomorrow morning (Because there are 30 more projects waiting in the queue). .

Perfect way to finish a meal of sushi

I love Sushi. Out here in Hemet there is an all you can eat sushi bar that I love called Sushi Ray run by a wonderful chef named Max. You can eat all you want off a pretty sizeable menu for about $26.00 and if you know how much a sushi meal can cost with items like Caterpiller roll (Normally $10.00 ea.), Volcano ($12.99), and specialties like the Golden Tiger(Normally $11.99), you can get them at Max's all you can eat which is qute a bargain. Tuesday and Wednesdays are Men's nights and Women's nights respectively where if you are the correct nght's gender you can get 50% off on all alcohol purchased, and if you like alcohol I fuly recommend the cucumber saketini and the Korean Hite beer which I an only find a Sushi Ray.

Here is the perfect way to finish a meal at Sushi Ray, a quail egg shooter:

Christmas in my office

Christmas is alive in my IT department!

Brian Darnell
darnellster@gmail.com
http://12hourhalfday.blogspot.com
http://www.unvoicedvisions.com

3 Question Wake up Call

Pulled from Dan Millman's Every Day Enlightenment.

Am I breathing - take a conscious breath
Am I relaxed - let go of any tension you notice
Am I doing whatever I am doing with refinement and grace (allow yourself do to so

My Weekly Review

I am about to embark on my weekly review. If you are not familiar with GTD, the weekly review in concept is in fact a review done; you guessed it weekly of one’s system. To put it in a nutshell, I look at all the lists of things I have decided to do and make sure they are set up correctly. These lists include Projects, Next actions, a calendar, and notes. In reality for a lot of us a weekly review is not done weekly. In this case I am doing mine a week late. Why? My schedule was different then normal last week and I didn’t do it; excuses, excuses.

Here are the steps I follow for my weekly review.

1. Get clear
   This changes, this could involve processing my inbox, doing a brain dump onto paper, or it could be skipped if I already feel clear prior to my weekly review. A recommendation my friend Barb gave me for this step is to do it the night before and do the weekly review in the morning; I prefer to do my weekly review at night so I get clear in about 30 minutes as the first step in my review. In this case, this blog entry is part of getting clear, I am using it to lay a foundation for this review


2. Get current
   I make sure that all of my projects have next actions associated with them. I then review my next actions lists and make sure that all of them are associated with projects. If they are not I either get rid of them (if they are irrelevant) or create projects for them. I then review my incubate list (This is what I call my someday/maybe) and see if any of those items are ready to become projects or get deleted.


3. Get creative
   This usually involves me dreaming. I do a centering exercise, either GRACE or the 6 breaths, 6 thoughts exercise. I then write what I want on my paper or on screen. This may sound kind of strange but this works for me.

Gratitude Journal

For a little over a month now I have been keeping a gratitude journal. I spent a few minutes each morning listing off 5 things I am grateful for. My friend Tara shared this concept with me and it has been helping me tremendously in life. My entry today was pretty significant and I would like to share it here.

5 things I am grateful for? Well for one, this list. I love this list that I have been making. I know it is a journal but it is also a list of journal entries to be technical and I like being technical. I am grateful for this list because it has helped me to get outside of my head about my life. I am grateful for each and every bit of it; the good and the bad.

I am grateful for the fire. In June of 1998 my house burned down and I am grateful for that. How does that work? Well it helped me to let go of my attachment to material possessions; stuff. And the ability to let go of that has helped me tremendously in my life. I LOVE my camera and the beautiful photos I take with it but I can live without it. I am not owned by the things I own because of that fire and I am grateful for that.

I am grateful for my time of unemployment in 2003. I had been working as a temp at a local college for about 5 years. I was a network technician and thought I was the greatest but got my wake up call when all of the temporary employees were laid off and I was not rehired into a permanent position. I was devastated and felt it was the end of the world. I spent a few months in unemployment but was eventually able to find the job I have now which I love. I am grateful for the lesson of humility it taught me.

I am grateful for the job I have now. It taught me how inexperienced I was and taught me to approach things with a beginners mind. I always felt I had the mind of a prodigy and working in a tough environment taught me that just being bright doesn't cut it. I am grateful for that.

I am grateful for the wound I took in 2005. I was riding my bike and lost my balance and fell. My right leg was impaled by my brake handle. Recovery was quick but the accident taught me that I am not invincible. I am grateful for that.

I am grateful for lessons of humility and the awareness that bad incidents can have good consequences. I have learned about detachment, humility, and meditation through reflecting on my life and I am grateful for that.

Comitting to a complaint free world

My good friend Tara on her blog about comitting to a complain free world.

Here is the gist; you make a committment to stop complaining. If you complain about anything switch the bracelet to the other wrist and start your committment over from day one. Along with Tara I am making the committment
to do this for 21 days. You have my permission to point out to me when I need to move my bracelet to the other arm. And I’ll keep you posted on how I do.
If you want to do this too, let me know and we can support each other. I know this won't be easy for me. Join in and let's make this a complaint free world.

Mug boss!

I have wanting one of these for ever and my pal Troy gifted me earlier this week. Thank you Troy!!!
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

Another Reason for Resistance

Another reason for resistance to a next action is the thought that you will lose momentum on a project by marking a next action as complete without planning the next action or moving to it. This recquires diligence to the weekly review and project planning.
Make sure you are doing the weekly review weekly and you are reviewing your context lists as you access those contexts. If not, you will go numb to them. (Remember, this isn't failure, you still have those lists waiting for you, we all fall off the wagon sometimes)

Breath

Breathe in huge, breath in till hurts, but make sure you breathe out longer, slower, deeper, and gentler in every way.

Gratitude

I am grateful for this moment, I lift my arms up, smile huge and thank God for this life, this moment and everything about what I am , who I am, and what I can do for him. I love my good and holy lord for all he has done for me in the now, the present and the future eternity that is my life because of what he did for me.

Let's try this again. Re: favorite lense - attempt #2.

Since blogger obviously doesn't want me tpo post the photo of my lense, let's try it again with a different photo.

Once again, this is my Sony Alpha A700 with my minolta 50mm f1.7 lense.

I love the shots I get with this lense evidenced by:

Ketchup chips are freakin great!

Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

Don't you wish you were here?

I love sushi
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

Big lense

My buddy Milton lent me this 28 to 200mm Tamron zoom lense for a couple of days. I really like it's zoom but my Sony lense is wider. I took some shots with it at the mission inn on Sunday which should be up this evening (I crashed hard when we got home at 3:30 and didn't wake up till 5 this morning)
I am at work right now and will try to use it only on my breaks. It's aperture maxes out at 4 so my little 50mm minolta (fstop 1.2) sees more play on macro shots.
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

Smile

Take a deep breath.. Smile, smile big and smile genuine